I know that recipe cook times are lies. I’m accustomed to the belief among recipe writers that vegetables come pre-diced. I grit my teeth and bear the classic “Ok, next pan fry 6 chicken breasts. This should take, what?, 8 minutes?” I’ve been instructed to make pan sauces with a teaspoon of wine and brown sugar that instantly turned into a small spot of toffee in the middle of the pan.
But I’ve seen a whole new low today. This “30 minute recipe” has for its first ingredient: 4 cooked chicken breasts. Four cooked chicken breasts. Four cooked chicken breasts. You know how on a weeknight, when you’re clearing out your pantry, you tend to have two or more pounds of already-cooked meat you’re looking for something to do with? Well, you’re in luck, this recipe will only take 30 minutes. If not, I hope your kids don’t get too cranky when they’re hungry. Maybe you should tide them over with the board of fruit, sausage, and fine cheeses you surely also have sitting around the house.